Helpful Units of Measure & Conversions

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 Mefiante (October 20, 2009, 13:55:34 PM):
Got this in my inbox the other day.

Enjoy, as I did! :)

'Luthon64

Quote
Ratio of an igloo’s circumference to its diameter = Eskimo Pi

2,000 pounds of Chinese soup = Won ton

1 millionth of a mouthwash = 1 microscope

Time between slipping on a peel and smacking the pavement = 1 bananosecond

Weight an evangelist carries with God = 1 billigram

Time it takes to sail 220 yards at 1 nautical mile per hour = Knotfurlong

16.5 feet in the Twilight Zone = 1 Rod Serling

Half of a large intestine = 1 semicolon

1,000,000 aches = 1 megahurts

Basic unit of laryngitis = 1 hoarsepower

Shortest distance between two jokes = A straight line

453.6 graham crackers = 1 pound cake

1,000,000 microphones = 1 megaphone

2,000,000 bicycles = 2 megacycles

365.25 days = 1 unicycle

2,000 mockingbirds = 2 kilomockingbird

52 cards = 1 decacards

1 kilogram of falling figs = 1 Fig Newton

1,000 millilitres of wet socks = 1 litrehosen

1 millionth of a fish = 1 microfiche

1,000,000,000,000 pins = 1 terapin

10 rations = 1 decoration

100 rations = 1 C-ration

2 monograms = 1 diagram

2.4 statute miles of intravenous surgical tubing at Yale University Hospital = 1 IV League

100 Senators = Not 1 decision
 rwenzori (October 21, 2009, 05:19:00 AM):
El Reg has some great ones at:

http://www.theregister.co.uk/2007/08/24/vulture_central_standards/

Example:

Quote
Length

The standard unit of length shall be the EU standard (Florentine) linguine (unboiled at sea level), defined as 1lg, representing 14cm, 0.02784 perches, 0.462 Japanese shyaku or 0.0007568 Ancient Greek stadium ptolemys

For greater than 1lg, the following should be used:

* Double-decker bus = 65.85lg
* Brontosaurus = 15 double-decker buses laid bumper-to-bumper
* Length across known universe at shortest point = 136 trillion brontosauruses laid nose-to-tail

Examples

* Paleontologists suggest that while vicious predator Ballmersaurus rex measured three double-decker buses from nose to tail, his brain was no bigger than a walnut.
* Imagine Paris Hilton's dismay when she whipped open the prisoner warder's flies to find he was only packing a half-linguine.