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I lol'd

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BoogieMonster
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« Reply #1050 on: October 08, 2019, 14:39:55 PM »

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Tweefo
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« Reply #1051 on: October 12, 2019, 14:29:11 PM »

I rather enjoyed this one.  Grin

Two scientists, one from the Czech Republic and one from Austria, travelled to America to study the legendary grizzly bear.

When they failed to return from their first trip into the woods, two park rangers went looking for them and quickly tracked down a male and a female bear who’d been seen near the scientists’ campsite.

Their apprehension was proven justified when they euthanized the female grizzly and found the remains of the Austrian inside of her.

The first park ranger said sadly, “You know what this means…”

The second ranger said, “Yeah, the Czech is in the male.”
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BoogieMonster
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« Reply #1052 on: October 23, 2019, 09:47:28 AM »

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brianvds
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« Reply #1053 on: October 23, 2019, 10:48:06 AM »



And koalas are descended from crossing bears and guinea pigs, and kangaroos by crossing rabbits with horses, and so on. And thus the problem of enough space on the ark is solved. Put that in your pipe and smoke it, evilutionists!
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BoogieMonster
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« Reply #1054 on: October 24, 2019, 14:27:25 PM »

Quote
An atheist dies and goes to hell

The devil welcomes him and says:"Let me show you around a little bit." They walk through a nice park with green trees and the devil shows him a huge palace. "This is your house now, here are your keys." The man is happy and thanks the devil. The devil says:"No need to say thank you, everyone gets a nice place to live in when they come down here!"

They continue walking through the nice park, flowers everywhere, and the devil shows the atheist a garage full of beautiful cars. "These are your cars now!" and hands the man all the car keys. Again, the atheist tries to thank the devil, but he only says "Everyone down here gets some cool cars! How would you drive around without having cars?".

They walk on and the area gets even nicer. There are birds chirping, squirrels running around, kittens everywhere. They arrive at a fountain, where the most beautiful woman the atheist has ever seen sits on a bench. She looks at him and they instantly fall in love with each other. The man couldn´t be any happier. The devil says "Everyone gets to have their soulmate down here, we don´t want anyone to be lonely!"

As they walk on, the atheist notices a high fence. He peeks to the other side and is totally shocked. There are people in pools of lava, screaming in pain, while little devils run around and stab them with their tridents. Other devils are skinning people alive, heads are spiked, and many more terrible things are happening. A stench of sulfur is in the air.

Terrified, the man stumbles backwards, and asks the devil "What is going on there?" The devil just shrugs and says: "Those are the christians, I don´t know why, but they prefer it that way".
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BoogieMonster
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« Reply #1055 on: November 15, 2019, 15:56:22 PM »

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BoogieMonster
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« Reply #1056 on: November 20, 2019, 13:03:39 PM »

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Tweefo
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« Reply #1057 on: December 17, 2019, 11:54:53 AM »

Husband and Wife are Christmas Shopping at a busy shopping mall just before Christmas. The wife suddenly noticed that her husband was missing and as they had a lot to do, so she called him on his cell.

The wife said " Where are you, you know we have lots to do."

He said "You remember the jewellers we went into about 10 years ago, and you fell in love with that diamond necklace? I could not afford it at the time and I said that one day I would get it for you?"

Little tears started to flow down her cheek and she got all

choked up…

"Yes, I do remember that shop," she replied.

"Well, I am in the telescope shop next door to that."

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

***Insert favourite hobby shop name instead of Telescope shop.***
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brianvds
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« Reply #1058 on: December 21, 2019, 08:43:49 AM »

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brianvds
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« Reply #1059 on: December 30, 2019, 09:19:33 AM »

If movies had clickbait titles...

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Rigil Kent
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« Reply #1060 on: January 06, 2020, 12:36:31 PM »

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BoogieMonster
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« Reply #1061 on: January 06, 2020, 12:59:51 PM »



I am saddened to report that this holiday I was exposed to the History channel once more and can report the fare is much more of the same. A relative started regaling tales of aliens and moon landing conspiracies that are "the actual truth". This channel is now worse than Rhema TV.
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brianvds
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« Reply #1062 on: January 07, 2020, 05:30:13 AM »


I am saddened to report that this holiday I was exposed to the History channel once more and can report the fare is much more of the same. A relative started regaling tales of aliens and moon landing conspiracies that are "the actual truth". This channel is now worse than Rhema TV.

I saw a post on Quora in which an archaeologist noted that outside of professional archaeology circles, virtually no one believes that the pyramids were built by the Egyptians, or served as tombs. I would guess History Channel may have something to do with this... :-)
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Mefiante
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In solidarity with rwenzori: Κοπρος φανεται


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« Reply #1063 on: January 07, 2020, 07:28:15 AM »

I saw a post on Quora in which an archaeologist noted that outside of professional archaeology circles, virtually no one believes that the pyramids were built by the Egyptians, or served as tombs.
Egyptians?!  What on earth are you talking about?!  Clearly, it was aliens hailing from somewhere near the Pleiades, and not just the Egyptian pyramids, either!  In ancient times, they also gave us other pyramids and monuments around the globe, and then visited Cydonia on Mars to carve a giant face in a rock, plus a few more pyramids, just to show us feeble humans that they aren’t in the mood for any nonsense.

At least that’s the story as far as Wayne Herschel and Birgitt Lederer are concerned, as inspired by such unbridled genius luminaries as von Däniken, Sitchin, Bauval, Hancock, etc. ad nauseam.  Reading the reviews of the Herschel & Lederer book makes for an interesting exercise when one compares the number, thoughtfulness, and literacy of the “critical” to the “positive” ones.

'Luthon64
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BoogieMonster
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« Reply #1064 on: January 07, 2020, 09:30:32 AM »

I saw a post on Quora in which an archaeologist noted that outside of professional archaeology circles, virtually no one believes that the pyramids were built by the Egyptians, or served as tombs.
Egyptians?!  What on earth are you talking about?!  Clearly, it was aliens hailing from somewhere near the Pleiades, and not just the Egyptian pyramids, either!  In ancient times, they also gave us other pyramids and monuments around the globe, and then visited Cydonia on Mars to carve a giant face in a rock, plus a few more pyramids, just to show us feeble humans that they aren’t in the mood for any nonsense.

You're slipping Mefi, you say "ancient", but this is all PRE-ancient. They are much, much, much older than any civilization that has thus far been recorded, and the Egyptians merely discovered them. HA!
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