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Judgement Day

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rwenzori
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Merda accidit.


« Reply #15 on: May 14, 2011, 18:58:37 PM »

Rwenzori Petcare Industries LLC, in association with Kowloon Melamine Dogfood Ltd and Eternal Earth-Bound Pets, brings you peace of mind for the upcoming rapture:

Quote
You've committed your life to Jesus. You know you're saved.  But when the Rapture comes what's to become of your loving pets who are left behind?   Eternal Earth-Bound Pets takes that burden off your mind.



http://eternal-earthbound-pets.com/
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Jesus
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« Reply #16 on: May 14, 2011, 19:28:53 PM »

ANNOUNCEMENT!

Judgement Day has been postponed. Dad's still on holiday, and not expected back for a few years.

Remember - you heard it first at South African Skeptics.
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Mefiante
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In solidarity with rwenzori: Κοπρος φανεται


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« Reply #17 on: May 14, 2011, 21:32:59 PM »

Thanks for that update, Jesus.  You guys had trouble securing a venue for the send-off, I hear.  I’m sure, as sceptics, we’re all much relieved at this heartening development of your dad’s continued absence (even though in truth not many could tell when he’s actually around).  Would those “few years” be biblical years where one day is a thousand years, or ordinary people years?

Also, do you have a message for Harold Camping’s lot?  Anything at all?

'Luthon64
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Jesus
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« Reply #18 on: May 15, 2011, 04:36:28 AM »

Also, do you have a message for Harold Camping’s lot?  Anything at all?


Verily I say unto you, it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle, than for a fuckwit to enter into the kingdom of God.
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Tweefo
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« Reply #19 on: May 15, 2011, 09:20:09 AM »

On Saturday, while going to Pretoria from Middelburg, a big bakkie and a car came past at high speed. Both looked brand new to me and they had spray paint jobs on them with "Judgement Day" and a few bible verses. Now if they were new vehicles, were they bought on hire purchase agreements? Were the paint jobs done on credit? Are they filling them up with garage cards? If so, a bit dishonest I think. Going into debt with no intention of repaying, also, are they going to respray them on the 22nd? Have they booked the spray booth? Imagine driving those vehicles after the 21. Embarrassed
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Brian
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I think therefor I am, I think


« Reply #20 on: May 15, 2011, 10:37:46 AM »

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Verily I say unto you, it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle, than for a fuckwit to enter into the kingdom of God.
So Jesus, you actually appreciate an enquiring mind? Could've fooled me what with the sheep following the Shepherd story you told.
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Faerie
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« Reply #21 on: May 16, 2011, 10:33:44 AM »

Standing outside (Central Jhb), and abovementioned brand spanking new  4x4 double cab bakkie pulling one of these mobile billboards proclaiming:

JUDGMENT DAY 21 May 2011 and something about god never being wrong....

Whatever, new bakkie, new billboard, trawling Jhb city centre on a Monday morning.... someone, somewhere, is going to have plenty bad debt mounting post 21 May.....

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GCG
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« Reply #22 on: May 16, 2011, 11:12:42 AM »

find out who these morons are, and on the 22nd, offer to take over their assets at less than nothing, since they will be so fucked with credit.
better still.
on the 20th, ask them if you can have their house, car, daughter.... 
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Mutton
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« Reply #23 on: May 16, 2011, 13:37:45 PM »

Maybe, just maybe, it all started on the East Rand this morning, with the 3.1 magnitude tremor.
Maybe just a little three-point-oner to get us all in the mood?
Whaddyathink?
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Hermes
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« Reply #24 on: May 16, 2011, 13:52:53 PM »

Maybe, just maybe, it all started on the East Rand this morning, with the 3.1 magnitude tremor.
Maybe just a little three-point-oner to get us all in the mood?
Whaddyathink?

All quiet on the West Rand....
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Faerie
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« Reply #25 on: May 16, 2011, 13:58:12 PM »

Maybe, just maybe, it all started on the East Rand this morning, with the 3.1 magnitude tremor.
Maybe just a little three-point-oner to get us all in the mood?
Whaddyathink?

All is quiet on the West Rand....


Or in the Cape with a 4.3 tremor.....  Evil

http://www.news24.com/SouthAfrica/News/Southern-Cape-quake-sounded-like-plane-20110516
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BoogieMonster
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« Reply #26 on: May 16, 2011, 14:07:07 PM »

ANNOUNCEMENT!

Judgement Day has been postponed. Dad's still on holiday, and not expected back for a few years.

Remember - you heard it first at South African Skeptics.

Oh great, now we have to use an oxymoron: "It was revealed to me on SA skeptics".
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Faerie
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« Reply #27 on: May 16, 2011, 14:12:19 PM »

ANNOUNCEMENT!

Judgement Day has been postponed. Dad's still on holiday, and not expected back for a few years.

Remember - you heard it first at South African Skeptics.

Oh great, now we have to use an oxymoron: "It was revealed to me on SA skeptics".

It is written:  HIS day is like a year, and his year as a day.... Jesus, your Dad never could tell time.....
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Faerie
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« Reply #28 on: May 16, 2011, 15:37:33 PM »

Sheesh, they even have a countdown going, like I said Daddy cannot keep time, but if he logs on he can check when he's due...

http://www.may21-2011.com/
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Jesus
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« Reply #29 on: May 17, 2011, 05:04:28 AM »

Quote
Verily I say unto you, it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle, than for a fuckwit to enter into the kingdom of God.
So Jesus, you actually appreciate an enquiring mind? Could've fooled me what with the sheep following the Shepherd story you told.

Don't be rude about my stories now.

But yes. Only atheists get into heaven. Catch-22 at work, my child. If you believe in heaven and all the earthly religious crap, you are too stupid for the kingdom of heaven: if you don't believe, you get there anyway. So it is written.
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