Burning the Quran

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Hades (September 27, 2010, 13:54:46 PM):
There is in my humble but very well read and rather well informed absolutely brilliant(Ok not so humble after all) opinion , only one bible worth reading, and it was written by Spike Milligan!

From Spike Milligan – “The Bible According to Spike Milligan -Old Testament” (Penguin; London 1993. pp 1-2)



In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth.

And darkness was upon the face of the deep; this was due to a malfunction at the Lots Road Power Station.

And God said, Let there be light; and there was light, but Eastern Electricity Board said that He would have to wait until Thursday to be connected.

And God saw the light and it was good; He saw the quarterly bill and that was not good.

And God called the light Day, and the darkness he called Night, and so passed his G C S E.

And God said, Let there be a firmament and God called the firmament heaven, Freephone 999.

And God said, Let the waters be gathered together unto one place, and let the dry land appear, and in London it went on the market at six hundred pounds a square foot.

And God said, Let the earth bring forth grass, and the earth brought forth grass and the Rastafarians smoked it.
Faerie (September 28, 2010, 08:24:16 AM):
No, no, here's the best bible yet... and its an ongoing project:

Boreded Ceiling Cat makinkgz Urf n stuffs
1 Oh hai. In teh beginnin Ceiling Cat maded teh skiez An da Urfs, but he did not eated dem.

2 Da Urfs no had shapez An haded dark face, An Ceiling Cat rode invisible bike over teh waterz.

3 At start, no has lyte. An Ceiling Cat sayz, i can haz lite? An lite wuz.4 An Ceiling Cat sawed teh lite, to seez stuffs, An splitted teh lite from dark but taht wuz ok cuz kittehs can see in teh dark An not tripz over nethin.5 An Ceiling Cat sayed light Day An dark no Day. It were FURST!!!1

6 An Ceiling Cat sayed, im in ur waterz makin a ceiling. But he no yet make a ur. An he maded a hole in teh Ceiling.7 An Ceiling Cat doed teh skiez with waterz down An waterz up. It happen.8 An Ceiling Cat sayed, i can has teh firmmint wich iz funny bibel naim 4 ceiling, so wuz teh twoth day.

9 An Ceiling Cat gotted all teh waterz in ur base, An Ceiling Cat hadz dry placez cuz kittehs DO NOT WANT get wet.10 An Ceiling Cat called no waterz urth and waters oshun. Iz good.

11 An Ceiling Cat sayed, DO WANT grass! so tehr wuz seedz An stufs, An fruitzors An vegbatels. An a Corm. It happen.12 An Ceiling Cat sawed that weedz ish good, so, letz there be weedz.13 An so teh threeth day jazzhands.

14 An Ceiling Cat sayed, i can has lightz in the skiez for splittin day An no day.15 It happen, lights everwear, like christmass, srsly.16 An Ceiling Cat doeth two grate lightz, teh most big for day, teh other for no day.17 An Ceiling Cat screw tehm on skiez, with big nails An stuff, to lite teh Urfs.18 An tehy rulez day An night. Ceiling Cat sawed. Iz good.19 An so teh furth day w00t.

20 An Ceiling Cat sayed, waterz bring me phishes, An burds, so kittehs can eat dem. But Ceiling Cat no eated dem.21 An Ceiling Cat maed big fishies An see monstrs, which wuz like big cows, except they no mood, An other stuffs dat mooves, An Ceiling Cat sawed iz good.22 An Ceiling Cat sed O hai, make bebehs kthx. An dont worry i wont watch u secksy, i not that kynd uf kitteh.23 An so teh...fith day. Ceiling Cat taek a wile 2 cawnt.

24 An Ceiling Cat sayed, i can has MOAR living stuff, mooes, An creepie tings, An otehr aminals. It happen so tehre.25 An Ceiling Cat doed moar living stuff, mooes, An creepies, An otehr animuls, An did not eated tehm.

26 An Ceiling Cat sayed, letz us do peeps like uz, becuz we ish teh qte, An let min p0wnz0r becuz tehy has can openers.

27 So Ceiling Cat createded teh peeps taht waz like him, can has can openers he maed tehm, min An womin wuz maeded, but he did not eated tehm.

28 An Ceiling Cat sed them O hai maek bebehs kthx, An p0wn teh waterz, no waterz An teh firmmint, An evry stufs.

29 An Ceiling Cat sayed, Beholdt, the Urfs, I has it, An I has not eated it.30 For evry createded stufs tehre are the fuudz, to the burdies, teh creepiez, An teh mooes, so tehre. It happen. Iz good.

31 An Ceiling Cat sayed, Beholdt, teh good enouf for releaze as version 0.8a. kthxbai.

GCG (September 28, 2010, 15:21:36 PM):
i speak lolcat often, but the ppl here didnt follow so lekker, so i had to relax on the ossumness :-\
Hades (September 28, 2010, 16:57:25 PM):
i speak lolcat often, but the ppl here didnt follow so lekker, so i had to relax on the ossumness :-\

This looks cool, can you supply a link for me to see more?
Faerie (September 29, 2010, 08:19:17 AM):
i speak lolcat often, but the ppl here didnt follow so lekker, so i had to relax on the ossumness :-\

This looks cool, can you supply a link for me to see more?

Its a cat lover's paradise, here's a few links:



and finally, if you want proof of ceiling cat - here it is:



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