Top 50 Atheist Bumper Stickers/ T Shirts

[scienceteacherinexile]

I mentioned this list in another thread, and I know someone is going to ask me for it, so I will put it here.
The * marked ones were the ones the blogger liked best (I have since forgotten which blog I got it from).
The non numbered ones at the bottom I took from the comments. 
Can anyone else add to this??

1.   Abstinence Makes the Church Grow Fondlers
2.   Honk If Your Religious Beliefs Make You An Asshole
3.   Intelligent Design Makes My Monkey Cry
4.   Too Stupid to Understand Science? Try Religion.
5.   *There's A REASON Why Atheists Don't Fly Planes Into Buildings
6.   "Worship Me or I Will Torture You Forever. Have a Nice Day."¬ God.
7.   *God Doesn't Kill People. People Who Believe in God Kill People.
8.   If There is No God, Then What Makes the Next Kleenex Pop Up?
9.   He's Dead.
It's Been 2,000 years.
He's Not Coming Back.
Get OVER It Already!
10.   *All religion is simply evolved out of fraud, fear, greed, imagination, and poetry. Edgar Allen Poe.
11.   Viva La Evolución!
12.   Actually, If You Look It Up, The Winter Solstice Is The Reason For The Season
13.   I Wouldn't Trust Your God Even If He Did Exist
14.   Cheeses Is Lard. Argue With THAT If You Can.
15.   *People Who Don't Want Their Beliefs Laughed at Shouldn't Have Such Funny Beliefs
16.   Jesus is Coming? Don't Swallow That.
17.   Threatening Children With Hell Is FUN!
18.   GOD - APPLY DIRECTLY TO FOREHEAD!
19.   Jesus Told Me Republicans SUCK
20.   *God + Whacky Tobacky = Platypus
21.   God Doesn't Exist. So, I Guess That Means No One Loves You.
22.   When the Rapture Comes, We'll Get Our Country Back!
23.   Q. How Do We Know the Holy Ghost Was Catholic?
A. He Used the Rhythm Method Instead of a Condom.
24.   You Say "Heretic" Like It Was a BAD Thing
25.   I Love Christians. They Taste Like Chicken.
26.   *Science: It Works, Bitches.
27.   "Intelligent Design" Helping Stupid People Feel Smart Since 1987
28.   I Found God Between The Sheets
29.   I Gave Up Superstitious Mumbo Jumbo For Lent
30.   My Flying Monkey Can Beat Up Your Guardian Angel
31.   Every Time You Play With Yourself, God Kills a Kitten
32.   *If God Wanted People to Believe in Him, Then Why Did He Invent Logic?
33.   Praying Is Politically Correct Schizophrenia
34.   *ALL Americans Are African Americans
35.   *I Forget - Which Day Did God Make All The Fossils?
36.   I Was An Atheist Until The Hindus Convinced Me That I Was God
37.   The Spanish Inquisition: The Original Faith-based Initiative
38.   *If we were made in his image, then why aren't humans invisible too?
39.   *JESUS SAVES....You From Thinking For Yourself
40.   *How Can You Disbelieve in Evolution If You Can't Even Define It?
41.   *Q. How Can You Tell That Your God is Man-made?
A. If He Hates All the Same People You Do.
42.   Every Time You See a Rainbow, God is Having Gay Sex
43.   I Went to Public School in Kansas and All I Got Was This Lousy T-shirt and a Poor Understanding of the Scientific Method.
44.   WWJD = We Won. Jesus Died.
45.   The Family That Prays Together is Brainwashing the Children
46.   Oh, Look, Honey Another Pro-lifer For War
47.   *Another Godless Atheist for Peace and World Harmony
48.   God is Unavailable Right Now. Can I Help You?
49.   When Lip Service to Some Mysterious Deity Permits Bestiality on
Wednesday and Absolution on Sundays, Cash Me Out. Frank Sinatra.
50.   No Gods. No Mullets.



If God had intended me to go to church, he would have given me a bigger ass to sit on and a smaller brain to think with.

Don't pray in my school, and I won't think in your church.

who are you to question why your god doesn't want me to believe in him

When the Rapture Comes, Can I Have Your Car?

[Anacoluthon64]

• The trouble with gods is that they’re usually so holier-than-thou and judgemental
• Intelligent Design is neither
• Creationists have an irreducible complex
• If god’s so wise, how come he gave his sense of humour to the Germans?
• …and on the six billionth day, man created god
• God made me an atheist
• Reborn Darwinian
• Evolution deniers repent!
• Would your church give evolution equal time?
• Careful, your meme is showing!
• If Darwin was wrong, why has god evolved?

(ETA: I think this should be in the "Humour" board, no?)

'Luthon64

[scienceteacherinexile]

Some good ones. Are they yours or some you've catalogued?  I find some things I hear or read that I keep for my own use.  I am sooo going to get a T-shirt printed with (BIG) JESUS SAVES  then underneath (smaller) you from thinking for yourself.  Although, I might tweak that just a bit.

Yeah, it is more humor.
Bluegray, can you move it??

[Anacoluthon64]

Some are my own, some Dr Luthon64's and some found on the web (or derivations of same).  Personal favourite is “Would your church give evolution equal time?”  It first stuns, then riles the fundies every time - sadly, not often enough into silence.

ETA: “If Jesus saves, how is it that he always needs money?”

'Luthon64

[wandapec]

What a great way to start the morning! I had a good laugh.

[Tweefo]

JESUS SAVES yes but Dion saves you more

[Warm Lug]

On a T-shirt:

GOD IS COMING!
and she is pissed off!

[Anacoluthon64]

A few more, courtesy of Dr 'Luthon64 and yours truly:

• Religion: Society’s Brain Laundromats.
• Religion is so much more than just a crutch. It’s a whole-brain prosthesis.
• God is a false idol!
• God is the black hole into which all reason is crushed.
• Hell hath no fury.  Heaven hath no bliss.  God hath no evidence.
• God: Piling up innocent corpses since before the K-T extinction event.
• Religion is what happens whenever someone’s got too much sects on the brain.

'Luthon64

[ArgumentumAdHominem]

I can never be certain of what true creativity means when I think about the way that our minds work.  Perhaps I'm not the first to say ...

• We let you try it your way during the Dark Ages, now shut up and let us try it our way.
• Who's doing god's work? You in your Sunday best or the car guard right outside working on the sabbath to avoid starvation?
• Why do churches have alarm systems?  Isn't a sign saying "Petulant deity on guard" good enough?
• Professing how unique your religion is is probably the least unique facet of it.
• If all your money goes to the needy then surely they won't mind opening the ledger for review?

Okay so the last few aren't that good as bumper stickers.  Could do with some work.

P.S. While writing this, Google Ads suggested earning money for skepticism.  Maybe check it out? (this link includes the click-though id so it should earn the forum click-through cash. That's if I understand how GoogleAds work If I'm wrong, rather click the ad when you see it).

[bluegray V]

Fell asleep half way through all the legal speak here: https://www.google.com/adsense/localized-terms
But I'm pretty sure I can't allow links of adds in posts.

[Anacoluthon64]

A few more:

• For a miracle worker, god sure likes doing things the roundabout way
• Your Bronze Age pop idol can only carry a cognitively dissonant tune
• A fig for your deity!  Now where’s that cursed tree?
• Can god make a rock so flat he can’t hide under it?

'Luthon64

[johnno777]

How about:

God is Dead- Nietzsche

Nietzsche is Dead-God

[Centre]

People like you guys give Atheists a bad name. Why if you don't believe in God you always make comments about him? You guys have some unsorted issues.

[Centre]

Are Atheists moral?

[Tweefo]

People like you guys give Atheists a bad name. Why if you don't believe in God you always make comments about him? You guys have some unsorted issues.

They (Christians Muslims and others) don't make comments about us (Atheists) they want to (and do)kill us. The world carried on and if you can't take a few comments about your (stone age) believes I think the issue is with you. The Earth is not the centre of the universe, is not flat and evolution made it possible for you to sit at a computer - not some god. Live with it!